Something...
keeps dragging me back to
the ~past~
and not even a quiet walk through bloggyland
has bought me solace
for here i am
dragged back ~there~ again...
i am SUCH a hoarder!
i have every piece of art i've ever scribbled:
and every tattered photo ever taken
of ~me~
and even every tortured tEEnage poem that i ever put pen to paper!
(Aaaarrrggghhhh!)
Why just the other day i pulled out mY psychology folder from ye olde school days
and Tamsyn was interested! (As it is one of her chosen subjects this year)
so i guess that was something... useful... at least
sighhhh...
But what to do with it all though?
How do i piece it all together?
What to do with all these scraps of myself?
i think i nEEd to make sense of things
or why else would i keep wandering back ~there~ again?
i think i would like to sEE a picture that is ~complete~ somehow
perhaps i'm just searching for mE?
that girl hidden amongst the scattered jigsaw puzzle pieces
i certainly fEEl like a scattered picture of seLf
some days...
But will i ever make sense of it all?
all these scraps of mE...
and after all this ~time~
just why should i bother anyway?
"Because your heart tells yOu to Vicki!"
(Somebody jump on that voice!)
sighhhh...
x
(Ps) and if you are having a day like me (sEE above)
and nEEd a little spark!
Go visit FireBlossom
SHE is a total hOOt!
(and nO this isn't a paid announcement... so oFF you go now!)
Quickly... she doesn't have all day!
ShEEsh!
x
Oh mY gOOdneSS!
and THEN if you want to be slaPPed right out of your self indulgent malaise
then spend a moment here: with the wonderful Deezden:
WoW what a story!
x
Oh and just one more ~fabulous~ bloggy to note:
http://raphs-ramblings.blogspot.com/
Go visit, YoU won't regret it! X:-)
and a quick stop off with the fabulous http://thepinkcowboy.blogspot.com/
and your day will be complete X:-)
*kissez*
THERE i'm fEEling much better now after all that bloggy ~Love~
18 comments:
I see it as trying to see, and record a sense of self. I do it too. It is trying to be a spectator of your 'self' to see how you' are',in relation to others.
Could it be that your sense of self is shaky and voice wants you to heal it?
Often depression comes about from lack of 'self' or beration of 'self'.
You feel inconsequential to others and the universe. The keeping of 'self' items reminds us that we were "here' and that we mattered.
xx♥ Hugs as ever.
Just goTTa find the *glue* i guess to help put it all together? Thanks Natalie xox
Mmm...I agree with Natalie...keeping the collections validates our journey here. It serves as a reference for those who come after us or are left behind. Your art work looks lovely - would like to see more of it. Now..off to visit your blog referrals!
xoxoxo
Hee! Hee! Flying over i sEE Audrey X:-)
I definitely think you should make something out of it all.
I don't do any art at all, but I have always pulled pictures that I like and kept them since I was about 14 years old.
I will be 53 on Saturday.
Anyway, I thought, no one will want this when I die, you know what it is like when yout think you are dying tomorrow, you try to get rid of things so others won't have too.
Anyway I'm making an altered book for my oldest daughter 'Angelique' right now and guess what have the pictures are from that are going in it. That's right.
Anyway, I think getting them together would be such a fantastic keepsake for your children. If they are scattered though, I don't think they will go through them.
Maybe make up a few.
Love Renee xoxo
Hi Vicki, when I said 'you' in my comment, I meant the common "you" not you personally.
I didn't write that exactly how I meant to say it. I should have said 'we' as a shared experience, instead of it sounding bossy and blaming. Sorry love, if I caused any offence at all.xx♥
How lucky you are to have so many passports to your past. Each picture or memento can prompt a memory of the precious, searching child and the amazing woman you've become. One of my greatest fears as I grow older is that I will forget my life --who I really was and am. For me, even many of the terrible times are valuable because I can see them as they happened , but also with the perspective of my age. It helps me remember the past and understand my present life.
Hugs,
Nancy
BTW, I had a lovely childhood but you could not pay me to relive my teen years. LOL!
Make something from them is you want to but don't throw those pictures away. You had the gift even then,
Hugs and luv,
Nancy
Renee <3 i know what you mean...
the first thought that came into my mind... oh actually maybe it was the second (!!!) when i was diagnosed with cancer was "Oh my lord i have to clean out all those boxes in the garage of all my "junk"!!!" (Couldn't have the sister in-laws going through them! Lol!) and Thankyou for those thoughts, perhaps i will put them together with that in mind xox
Natalie funny girl i would never think that you would set out to offend me *kissez*
and Nancy hunny come here so i can give you a big 'ol cyber (((HUG))) xox
Just because I am such a contrary, I gotta say...
Of course you know that that stuff and even your past are not really YOU. And really that stuff will not help you understand YOU because it isn't YOU.
You are pure divine LOVE, and all that other stuff is just what we are experiencing this time around. Keep it if it makes you smile, but don't let it drag you down...
I recently cleaned out my studio. My neighbour couldn't believe the paintings that I threw away. I keep a few that are still relevant, but it felt great and I know it has contributed greatly to this new influx of inspiration that is entering.
I never have good advice when people are feeling this way, I just know that it makes me feel not so much alone when I feel this way myself!
Does anyone ever find themselves 100%?
Hey DDZ X:-)
So glad you dropped by <3
and as usual you have *sNaPPed* me back to ~Truth~
Luv ya
xox
Vevay, you are right, sometimes i think i expect tOO much of myself x
~i should always remember, because i believe in it tOO, is that there is perfection in imperfection and that all is ok!~
Sometimes it's good to clear things out, and sometimes it's good to keep them and only one's self can know this. I have had times of 'clearing the decks', but on the whole I find it good to keep some precious things, with their memories.
Thank you for mentioning my blog!
That is awesome that you have all that art you did!
Hey "Hi" Raph and Tascha X:-)
Thanks so much for droPPing by x
First, THANK YOU for all the really wonderful comments on my blog(s)!
For whatever reason, your page to an absolute AGE to load for me, but once it did, I really enjoyed my visit! I love the music, and what a marvelous surprise to find that my scribblings had been recommended! Thanks so much!!!
What a beautiful bluebird you posted for Renee!
And I think it's fantastic that you've kept everything from your past. You don't need to do anything with them. Just knowing that they're there is wondering. It provides a sense of accomplishment, substance, even if no one else sees it. I don't keep everything I've ever done, but I do think my children might want a piece of me after I'm gone.
Bella <3 Perhaps i should do a scrap book X:-)
Fireblossom X:-) i did some bloggy 'house/spring cleaning' i hope that helps with the downloading of my page!
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