a ~Whale~ or a Mermaid?

Recently, in a large French city, a poster featuring a young, thin and
tanned woman appeared in the window of a gym.

It said: "THIS SUMMER DO YOU WANT TO BE A MERMAID OR A WHALE?"

A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match
those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question
posed by the gym.

To Whom It May Concern:

Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious
humans). They have an active sex life, they get pregnant and have
adorable baby whales. They have a wonderful time with dolphins,
stuffing themselves with shrimp. They play and swim in the seas,
seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Barren Sea and the coral
reefs of Polynesia. Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded
CDs.
They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other
than humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone
in the world.

Mermaids don't exist. If they did exist, they would be lining up
outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity
crisis. Fish or human? They don't have a sex life because they kill
men who get close to them, not to mention how could they have sex?
Therefore they don't have kids either. Not to mention who wants to
get close to a girl who smells like a fish store?

The choice is perfectly clear to me; I want to be a whale.

P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that
only skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream
with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver and a
coffee with my friends. With time we gain weight because we accumulate
so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more
room it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren't
heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy. Beginning
today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think,
"Good gosh, look how smart I am!"

<3